"No, we can't give that to you, your son is 18."

So, Willie was sick last week and we payed a visit to Insta-not-care to have a strep test done.  I called to get the results and was denied. 
Conversation:
"No we can't give that information to you, your son is 18." 
"But I am his mother." 
"Sorry, it's a HIPAA thing; we can call him." 
"He doesn't answer his phone, can you text him the results?"
"No, we don't text - we can call him."
"He won't know what to do with the information."
"We are sorry."

(So, I sent Karl and Willie back to Insta-not-care to get the results in person.  No strep but a bacterial infection in his throat and mouth.  He needed a prescription and allowed a parent to fill it for him -- no need to follow the "18 rule" at the pharmacy.)

So Willie needed a copy of his SLCC transcript for a scholarship.  (Last time we needed a transcript, I drug Willie out of school and took him to SLCC and went through the whole "get a transcript" process (he was 17 then).  The person at the SLCC transcript place told me that next time I could just get it for him.)  Using the previous transcript retrieval process experience, I ventured on my own to get the SLCC transcript.  I paid for the transcript at the cashier's desk (they took my $5 with no question). Little did I realize that being 18 puts him in a different transcript category.
Conversation:
"Last time, the person in charge told me I could get his transcript for him."
"Sorry, he was 17 then."
"So what do I need to do?
"Well, you could get him to sign a paper giving you permission to get it for him."
"But I am here now."
"Sorry, we need something from him giving you permission, he is 18 now."
"So, how do you verify that the person I get a transcript for has written the note?"
"Well, we don't."
"So, I could go out of this office, write a note for my son giving me permission to get his transcript?"
"I guess so, but we would know you did that and we wouldn't give it to you."
"Hmm . . . well, I am not going to do that."

So, I called the school and asked the attendance secretary for a favor. She tracked Willie down in his humanities class, had him write a note giving me permission to get his transcript, faxed it to SLCC.  I waited and within minutes left with the transcript.